Dr. Sparrow

When a ‘big kid’ has accidents

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by New York Times Family Column

Question: My 9-year-old daughter doesn’t seem to notice she has to urinate until the need is urgent. I often see her fidgeting and hopping from one foot to the other, and when I tell her to go, I see the dawning look of realization on her face.

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Don’t turn mealtime into a power struggle

by New York Times Family Column May 12, 2010
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Question: My 9-month-old is resisting solid foods, and mealtimes are turning into a power struggle. We introduced solids at six months, and she has been breast-fed, with an occasional bottle of breast milk. She is not interested in bottles anymore. We are trying not to push her too hard but she ends up eating only [...]

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The ‘only child’ – pros and cons

by New York Times Family Column April 19, 2010
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Question: I have an only child. What’s your best advice for raising one? Answer: Raising an only child brings special challenges and rewards. An only child is always a “first child.” Parents may feel that no other child can compare. But they may also be at a loss because they don’t have the experience with [...]

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It takes a village

by New York Times Family Column April 9, 2010
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Question: I’ve seen parents benefit from the exchange of advice on the sidelines at a soccer game, and by volunteering together for a parent-teacher association. But not every parent can participate. How can we help restore and strengthen social networks that nourish parents? Networking reduces not only parents’ anxieties but also overuse of the medical [...]

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Baby sleepy time – when, how long and help!

by New York Times Family Column April 4, 2010
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Sleep requirements vary from one child to another, and they change as a child grows. Naps evolve, too. Newborn infants will sleep and wake periodically throughout the day and night.  At 3 or 4 months, babies will need several naps during the day, for a total of about 5 hours. Six-month-olds usually need morning and [...]

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Head banging…and we’re not talking about rock ‘n roll!

by New York Times Family Column March 28, 2010
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Question: When he is frustrated, our 25-month-old boy hits himself or bangs his head. His mother and I don’t know whether this behavior is normal. One set of in-laws considers it bizarre. Other families are experiencing the same thing, we learned from our web research. We understand that at his age, our son has little [...]

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Boys height issues

by New York Times Family Column March 16, 2010
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Question: My 15-year-old son hasn’t grown much, if at all, for about a year, including his foot size. Has he stopped growing? Or might he still have another growth spurt? I know that boys often grow until they are 21. Answer:  Many factors determine a child’s pattern of growth and final adult height: genes, diet [...]

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Children learn from parents and parents learn from children

by New York Times Family Column March 10, 2010
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Question: My husband and I have different opinions about how parents’ behavior affects a child. I believe that the child learns from your behavior and watches how you react to situations, in turn learning how to handle his emotions. If you are patient even when a child is fussy, that helps him learn to be [...]

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From discipline to self-discipline

by New York Times Family Column March 4, 2010
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The goal of parental discipline is to help a child rely on his own motivation — to control his impulses, manage his emotions, respect the needs, feelings and rights of others, and “do the right thing” for its own sake. A child who believes in himself can dare to face his mistakes. Gradually he must [...]

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“Where did I come from?”

by New York Times Family Column February 21, 2010
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Question: My older daughter was conceived through IVF (in vitro fertilization). Shortly after her birth I began wondering when she might ask the inevitable question, “Where did I come from?” What would you say?

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Toddler resists naps

by New York Times Family Column February 17, 2010
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Question: My 3-year-old son now resists a nap until late afternoon. Of course that affects his behavior. (We also have a 5-month-old baby boy, which is part of the problem.) If our 3-year-old eventually puts himself down for a nap in late afternoon, bedtime is a nightmare.

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A child’s ‘big emotions’

by New York Times Family Column February 8, 2010
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Question: How do I help an almost-6-year-old learn to handle disappointment and frustration? This is a child with big emotions, both positive and negative. Nearly every time he doesn’t get his way, he instantly gives in to his impulse to stomp, throw something, cry, scream, and sometimes hit and push.

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Learning to walk

by New York Times Family Column January 29, 2010
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At about 12 months, as a child focuses her energy on the big developmental step of learning to walk, her emotional controls may be disrupted.

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A toddlers verbal challenges

by New York Times Family Column January 22, 2010
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By T. BERRY BRAZELTON, M.D., and JOSHUA SPARROW, M.D. from The New York Times Syndicate’s FAMILIES TODAY column. Question: My son is two and a half.  He speaks in sentences but his verbal exchanges are more descriptive than interactive — almost like a running commentary. He also has problems “naming” things. He doesn’t seem to grasp [...]

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A toddlers separation anxiety

by New York Times Family Column January 15, 2010
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By T. BERRY BRAZELTON, M.D., and JOSHUA SPARROW, M.D. from The New York Times Syndicate’s FAMILIES TODAY column. Question: I am a professional and a married mom with two wonderful boys, ages 3 and 1. The 3-year-old struggles with severe separation anxiety every time I go to work. He wants me to be the person who [...]

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A three year old’s ‘potty progress’

by New York Times Family Column January 9, 2010
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By T. BERRY BRAZELTON, M.D., and JOSHUA SPARROW, M.D. from The New York Times Syndicate’s FAMILIES TODAY column. Question: My 3-year-old daughter is fully potty-trained for urination — no diaper at night or for naps. But she refuses to use the toilet for a bowel movement and asks for a diaper instead (she will sit on [...]

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The Challenge of Single Parenting

by New York Times Family Column January 6, 2010
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By T. BERRY BRAZELTON, M.D., and JOSHUA SPARROW, M.D. from The New York Times Syndicate’s FAMILIES TODAY column. Between ages 3 and 6, children intensely identify with both of their parents. Yet half of all children spend significant time in a single-parent family, often after a divorce. How can single parents help children develop an identity?

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Coping with loss

by New York Times Family Column December 24, 2009
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Question: Since her great-grandfather died a few weeks ago, my 4-year-old daughter asks constantly about death. She asks why and how my mother died (which happened before my daughter was born). She wants to know if we parents will die at the same time, and who will look after her. It’s hard to be honest [...]

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Potty training around the clock

by New York Times Family Column December 18, 2009

By T. BERRY BRAZELTON, M.D., and JOSHUA SPARROW, M.D. from The New York Times Syndicate’s FAMILIES TODAY column. Question: Our 2-year-and-9-month-old son was potty-trained for daytime fairly easily at 2 and 1/2. At night he is still in a diaper, and he wakes up very wet. How do we help him to stay dry at night? [...]

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Teenager’s sleep habits

by New York Times Family Column December 11, 2009
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By T. BERRY BRAZELTON, M.D., and JOSHUA SPARROW, M.D. from The New York Times Syndicate’s FAMILIES TODAY column Question: I’m concerned about my 14-year-old son’s sleep habits. He has always stayed up late (1 a.m. is comfortable for him). Getting him to bed earlier is a challenge. Even if I succeed, he can’t fall asleep for [...]

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Easing sibling rivalry

by New York Times Family Column December 4, 2009
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By T. BERRY BRAZELTON, M.D., and JOSHUA SPARROW, M.D. from The New York Times Syndicate’s FAMILIES TODAY column As a child enters first grade, friends pull him away from his younger sibling. The first-grader may say, “Mom, no one wants to come over to my house. They know SHE’LL tag along.”

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Carrying a Tune

by New York Times Family Column November 30, 2009
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By T. BERRY BRAZELTON, M.D., and JOSHUA SPARROW, M.D. from The New York Times Syndicate’s FAMILIES TODAY column Question: My sons, who are 6 and 3, have been able to hum and sing on key since before they were 2. Why can’t my almost-5-year-old daughter carry a tune? Do most children grow to recognize pitch? I [...]

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When a three year old boy insists that he’s a girl

by New York Times Family Column November 23, 2009
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By T. BERRY BRAZELTON, M.D., and JOSHUA SPARROW, M.D. from The New York Times Syndicate’s FAMILIES TODAY column Question: How concerned should I be that my very imaginative 3-year-old son insists he’s a girl? I want him to express himself however he’s most comfortable, but I also want him not to be teased. The kids in [...]

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Reading to a toddler

by New York Times Family Column November 13, 2009
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By T. BERRY BRAZELTON, M.D., and JOSHUA SPARROW, M.D. from The New York Times Syndicate’s FAMILIES TODAY column Question:  I read a lot to my 2-year-old grandson, including “Mother Goose” and Maurice Sendak’s “Where the Wild Things Are.” We’re beginning to read toddler versions of “Grimm’s Fairy Tales.”

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Preventing Child Abuse: Sources of Strength

by New York Times Family Column November 2, 2009
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At a conference in Washington last week, reports on child abuse and neglect in the United States revealed a national crisis.

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Preventing Child Abuse: We Can Do Better

by New York Times Family Column October 23, 2009
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(This is the first in a two-part series on child abuse. Part 2, which will be available next week, outlines warning signs and sources of strength for families.)

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